fun things

Intro: I tried to be a web developer for a while, but it didn't work out. I stopped caring when I realized I'd spent 2 years in New York City without starting a band or playing any serious gigs; I was just writing SEO full-time on my laptop, while trying to hone developer skills. But ultimately I hated every minute of every day, because I did very little songwriting or rehearsing.

Maybe a healthier person could have handled all those things: working full-time, learning a new skill and finding a job in a new industry, and still rehearsing and writing new music. But I spent so much time hunched over a screen, and barely made ends meet. I felt like my life was getting sucked out of me, as I was ignoring my real passion and trying to impress people I hated. It started to feel like an exercise in hating myself.

People kept saying I needed to change my attitude, change my mind, give myself the fire to succeed in such an "exciting" industry as tech... They were wrong, though: What I needed to do was quit destroying my days, and go back to playing music. I was just so fucking sick of sitting at my laptop ALL DAY LONG! That is, writing about dumpster rental companies and writing Javascript don't feel like different activities to your eyes and back. Add on top of that the humiliation of being told you're not confident or outgoing enough by people who think they're helping you, depression, getting cabin fever from never leaving your apartment, and it just doesn't seem worth it to keep trying.

So I did that: I quit. And, shortly after I quit my career search, I actually did find a nice job at a tech company; they don't mind my soft-spokenness, and they seem to care a lot for artists, too. It was the right thing at the right time, I guess.

Anyway, web development is still pretty fun and useful--I made this site, after all. And I made these: